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? dhok The Last Aristocrat
posts: 228
, Alkali Metal, Saint Petersburg, Russian Federation
Decided "cow" is not irregular; strong stem *gʷow generalized, and Brugmann's + Szerémenyi's yielded a uniform stem ⲕⲟⲩ-.

"Water" (ⲡⲟⲩⲧⲉⲣ) shows an irregular singular paradigm. The nom./acc./voc. shows the reflex of *wódṛ; elsewhere the oblique stem *uden- appears.

nom.	ⲡⲟⲩⲧⲉⲣ
gen.	ⲟⲧⲉⲥ
dat.	ⲟⲧⲓⲛⲉ
ins.	ⲟⲧⲓⲛⲙⲓ
loc.	ⲟⲧⲓⲛⲓ

'Earth' shows a highly irregular paradigm. Note that the instrumental continues the original *ǵʰmeh₁ and adds the usual *-mi.

nom.	ⲅⲇⲟⲩⲛ
gen.	ⲅⲙ-ⲓⲥ
acc.	ⲅⲇⲟⲩⲛ-ⲉⲛ
dat.	ⲅⲙ-ⲉ
ins.	ⲅⲙ-ⲉⲙⲓ
loc.	ⲅⲙ-ⲓ
voc.	ⲅⲇⲟⲛ

Other archaic paradigms mostly got levelled out, e.g. ⲫⲟⲣ 'fire' is an unexceptional neuter consonant stem,
in thread: dhoklang scratchpad...3.0? NP: Bosporan
? dhok The Last Aristocrat
posts: 228
, Alkali Metal, Saint Petersburg, Russian Federation
The Noun

The usual story: three genders, seven cases (nom/gen/acc/dat/ins/loc/voc), and several declensions. The dual is retained in that most things that come in pairs have a nominative/accusative/vocative plural deriving from the dual, and this ending also appears on any noun when it is modified by ⲍⲟⲩ 'two'.


Our masculine paradigm is ⲡⲓⲉⲭⲟⲥ 'wolf'.

	sg.     	pl.
nom.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲥ		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲉ
gen.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲉⲥ(ⲟ)		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲩⲛ
acc.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲛ		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲩⲥ
dat.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲉ		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲩⲙⲟⲥ
inst.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲩ		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲟⲩⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲉ		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲉⲥⲓ
voc.	ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲓ		ⲡⲓⲉⲭ-ⲉ

Pseudo-duals and nouns modified by ⲍⲟⲩ have a plural ending -ⲟⲩ: ⲍⲟⲩ ⲡⲓⲉⲭⲟⲩ 'two wolves'.

The genitive singular is -ⲉⲥ(ⲟ) in the earliest extant inscriptions, but later shortens, rather irregularly, to -ⲉⲥ.

O-stem neuters have a nom./acc./voc. sg. ending -ⲟⲛ as usual, with a plural -ⲁ. Their pseudo-dual is -ⲉ.


We present ⲓⲍⲟⲥⲁ 'daughter-in-law'. There has been a lot of restructuring, particularly via suffixing *y and adding consonant-stem endings, rather as in Indo-Iranian. There is no separate vocative.

	sg.		pl.
nom.	ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁ		ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲓⲥ
gen.	ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲥ		ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲓⲟⲛ
acc.	ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲛ		ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲓⲉⲥ		
dat.	ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲓⲉ		ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲙⲟⲥ
inst.	ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲙⲓ		ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲓ		ⲓⲍⲟⲥ-ⲁⲥⲓ

Nominative, genitive, accusative, instrumental singular regularly continue *-eh₂, *-eh₂s, *-eh₂m, -eh₂-bʰi/mi. Dative -ⲁⲓⲉ suffixes the athematic ending, as *-eh₂-y-ey; similarly locative -ⲁⲓ (phonetically [a.i]) is via *-eh₂-y-i.

Nominative, genitive, accusative plural all suffix the athematic endings *-es *-on *-ṇs onto an extended theme *-eh₂-y- (the nominative represents a hiatus []). The dative, instrumental, and locative plural are regular from *-eh₂mos, *-eh₂mis, *-eh₂si.

The pseudo-dual ending for the nom./acc,/voc. is -ⲁⲓ, from *-eh₂-y-h₁e. (ⲍⲟⲩ 'two' has a feminine ⲍⲁⲓ.)


The merger of *u and *o means that u-stems are no longer a productive class (the nom./acc. singular, the pseudo-dual, and acc. plural have merged). Instead, there is a small subclass of masculine o-stems with a special nominative/vocative plural ending -ⲓⲓⲥ (from *-ewes): ⲧⲓⲛⲟⲥ, ⲧⲓⲛⲓⲓⲥ 'jaw, jaws' (from *ǵénus). In the oldest inscriptions these also have a special vocative singular -ⲟ.

Neuter u-stems fare a bit better. These have a special nominative/accusative/vocative singular ending -ⲟ (rather than -ⲟⲛ), and a pseudo-dual -ⲟⲩ.

'Tree' and 'knee' are common enough that they have comprise their own, highly archaic, subdeclension.

	sg.	du.	pl.
nom.	ⲧⲟⲩⲣⲟ	ⲧⲟⲩⲣⲟⲩ	ⲧⲟⲩⲣⲁ
gen.	ⲧⲣⲟⲥ		ⲧⲣⲓⲟⲛ
dat.	ⲧⲣⲓⲉ		ⲧⲣⲟⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲧⲣⲟⲙⲓ		ⲧⲣⲟⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲧⲣⲟⲓ		ⲧⲣⲟⲥⲓ
	sg.	du.
nom.	ⲕⲟⲩⲛⲟ	ⲕⲟⲩⲛⲟⲩ
gen.	ⲕⲛⲟⲥ	ⲕⲛⲓⲟⲛ
dat.	ⲕⲛⲓⲉ	ⲕⲛⲟⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲕⲛⲟⲙⲓ	ⲕⲛⲟⲙⲓⲥ
loc. 	ⲕⲛⲟⲓ	ⲕⲛⲟⲥⲓ

The genitive, dative and instrumental singular continue regularly from *-ews, *-ewey, *-ewmi. The locatives seem to derive from the endingless locatives *dréw *ǵnéw, with the locative -ⲓ attached after the *ew diphthong had been simplified.

The duals have been reshaped, as if from *dóruh₁, *ǵónuh₁. 'Knee' has no plural separate from the dual; the plural nominative of 'tree' is probably from *dóruh₂ > *dórwa > *dówra etc., but a reshaping would be undetectable.

The oblique plurals simply attach the ending (gen. *-om, dat. *-mos, ins. *-mis, loc. *-si) onto the oblique stem in *-ew-.

Our basic paradigm is that of ⲫⲟⲩⲥⲓⲥ 'master, paterfamilias'.

	sg.	pl.	du.
nom.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲥ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲓⲥ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓ
gen.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲥ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲟⲛ
acc.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲛ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲉⲥ
dat.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲉ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲙⲓ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲓ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲥⲓ
voc.	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓ	ⲫⲟⲩⲥ-ⲓⲓⲥ

The nominative, genitive,  accusative, dative, instrumental, vocative singular continue *-is, *-yes, *-im, *-yey, *-ih₁, *-i without issue. The locative singular should give plain -ⲓ, but has been reshaped to add the consonant-stem locative ending, presumably to prevent mergers with the dual and with the nominative/accusative of neuters.  Addition of the consonant-stem ending also explains the nom., gen., acc. plural endings (the dat., ins., loc. plural are unexceptional). The pseudo-dual continues *-ih₁ as usual.

The alternation between vocalic *i and consonantal *y has been leveled out pretty much everywhere.

Neuter i-stems show singular -ⲓ, plural -ⲁ, dual -ⲓ.

Consonant stems

Not that unusual. We've been seeing bits and pieces of them imported into other paradigms, anyways. ⲙⲉⲥ m. 'moon' (oblique stem ⲙⲉⲍ-) is our paradigm.

	sg.	pl.	du.
nom.	ⲙⲉⲥ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲓⲥ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲓ
acc.	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲉⲛ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲉⲥ
gen.	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲓⲥ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲟⲛ
dat.	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲉ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲙⲓ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲙⲓⲥ	
loc.	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲓ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲓⲥⲓ
voc.	ⲙⲉⲥ	ⲙⲉⲍ-ⲓⲥ

The accusative, genitive, dative, locative singular endings add the expected reflexes of *-ṃ, *-es, *-ey, *-i to the oblique stem. The instrumental occasionally adds an epenthetic (schwa secundum merging with *e). The nominative singular usually adds an -ⲥ that may or may not be absent in the vocative, though not here. When it is absent, the vocative usually adds -ⲓ, imported from the o-stems, though not always.

Nominative, accusative, genitive plural are normal, adding *-es, *-ṇs, *-om. Schwa secundum appears on occasion in the dative and instrumental plurals and basically always in the locative plural if not after a stop or *n (as *-n-si > ⲍⲓ.

Pseudo-dual is regular from *-h₁e.

Neuters, of course, have a uniform nom./acc./voc., usually without *-s, with plural in -ⲁ and pseudo-dual in -ⲉ (*-eh₁).

Sub-paradigm of consonant stems: r-stems. Example is ⲙⲁⲑⲉⲣ, which needs no gloss.

	sg.	pl.	du.
nom.	ⲙⲁⲑⲉⲣ	ⲙⲁⲑⲓⲣ-ⲓⲥ	ⲙⲁⲑⲓⲣ-ⲓ
acc.	ⲙⲁⲑⲓⲣ-ⲉⲛ	ⲙⲁⲑⲓⲣ-ⲉⲥ
gen.	ⲙⲁⲑⲣ-ⲓⲥ	ⲙⲁⲑⲣ-ⲟⲛ
dat.	ⲙⲁⲑⲣ-ⲉ	ⲙⲁⲑⲉⲣ-ⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲙⲁⲑⲉⲣ-ⲙⲓ	ⲙⲁⲑⲉⲣ-ⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲙⲁⲑⲣ-ⲓ	ⲙⲁⲑⲉⲣ-ⲥⲓ
voc.	ⲙⲁⲑⲓⲣ	ⲙⲁⲑⲓⲣ-ⲓⲥ

Apparent lengthened-grade before the m-endings and loc. pl. is from syllabic *ṛ. Otherwise, regular.

'Sister' has an irregular paradigm because of the change of *sr to dr. Note the application of Brugmann's Law in the nominative and accusative; by analogy with 'mother', this spread to endings before consonants (where we should see e.g. expected **ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲉⲣ-ⲙⲓ in lieu of reshaped ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲙⲓ). Brugmann's is blocked in the dual by the laryngeal of *-h₁e.

	sg.	pl.	du.
nom.	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲓⲥ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲣ-ⲓ
acc.	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲉⲛ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲉⲥ
gen.	ⲥⲡⲓⲇⲣ-ⲓⲥ	ⲥⲡⲓⲇⲣ-ⲟⲛ
dat.	ⲥⲡⲓⲇⲣ-ⲉ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲙⲓ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲥⲡⲓⲇⲣ-ⲓ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲥⲓ
voc.	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲣ	ⲥⲡⲓⲥⲟⲩⲣ-ⲓⲥ

Neuter s-stems

One more paradigm before bed. Neuter s-stems present no real surprises (except for the strange plural), but they do maintain e~o ablaut. Paradigm is ⲛⲓⲃⲟⲥ 'cloud'.

	sg.	pl.	du.
nom.	ⲛⲓⲃⲟⲥ	ⲛⲓⲃⲟⲩⲥ-ⲁ	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲥ-ⲓ
gen.	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲥ-ⲓⲥ	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲥ-ⲟⲛ
dat.	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲥ-ⲉ	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲍ-ⲙⲟⲥ
ins.	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲍ-ⲙⲓ	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲍ-ⲙⲓⲥ
loc.	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲥ-ⲓ	ⲛⲓⲃⲓⲥ-ⲓ

Entirely unexceptional— /z/ for underlying /s/ before /m/ is regular—except for the nominative/accusative plural. Here the usual neuter -ⲁ was added to the reflex of the Szereményi-lengthened original plural *nebʰōs.

There should be a few really irregular paradigms—'cow',  'water' are coming to mind. I'll tackle them tomorrow.
in thread: dhoklang scratchpad...3.0? NP: Bosporan
? dhok The Last Aristocrat
posts: 228
, Alkali Metal, Saint Petersburg, Russian Federation
(shamelessly kidnapped from the Zeeb, because the Zeeb is shit at doing tables. Also, mèþru et sim.)

Bosporan (spoken in Crimea and the Krasnodar area, not the area around Constantinople) is attested over a time period spanning about 1200 years in numerous texts and inscriptions; it is about as well-attested as Tocharian. Two main stages are attested: Old Bosporan, written with the Greek alphabet, from about 400 BC to around 150 AD. A relative lull of about two centuries follows; Late Bosporan is attested from around 350 AD and shows clear signs of Gothic influence, including in the alphabet. The corpus fizzles out around 800 AD, and the last speakers probably lived around the turn of the millennium.

Bosporan comprised a branch of its own in IE, and seems to be somewhere in between Balto-Slavic and the Greek/Armenian/Phrygian group (unsurprising given its location). In line with the former, it maintains no trace of interconsonantal laryngeals, merges common IE with , and possesses instrumental/dative/ablative endings in *m. In common with the latter, Bosporan possesses an augment, a thematic 3sg in *-ei, and (in common with Armenian and maybe Thracian) a stop shift *T *D *Dʰ to Tʰ T D. Grassmann's Law is also operable, but it applies to contemporary aspirates (e.g. those from PIE *T.) Bosporan distinguishes *a from *o and is a centum language.

A brief overview of the historical phonology of Old Bosporan follows. Late Bosporan gets a little weird.

Initial *e-epenthesis. This accounts for the lengthened reflexes of word-initial laryngeals before a vowel; so where Rix's Law turns *HC- into *HeC- into Greek, the Bosporan reflex comes via *eHC-.

À la Western Romance, initial *sC- also gives *esC-—so this was probably just a general rule when a fricative was found word-initially before a consonant.

Common IE changes. The usual, but (as usual!) with some dialectal flavor.

*h₁e *h₂e *h₃e > ĕ ă ŏ
*eh₁ *eh₂ *eh₃ > ē ā ō

Initial *H treated as above, with epenthesis. Interconsonantal and word-final *H seem to have disappeared without a trace. Schwa secundum, however, merges with *e as in Greek.

*iH *uH give *ī *ū, but (as in Tocharian) *ih₂ *uh₂ > *ya *wa. Cf. ⲍⲁⲙⲟⲥ 'smoke', which must have had an intermediate *dʰwamos.

Short *o in open syllables gives ō, apparently by Brugmann's. It's entirely unsurprising that Bosporan would share some dialectal features with Tocharian and Indo-Iranian.

Szereményi's Law: Word-final *VRs gives V:R

Siebert's Law: *CCw, *CCy > CCuw, CCiy.

Thorn clusters metathesize as in Greek and II.


*ḱ ǵ ǵʰ > k g gʰ.

Glide fortition. Word-initially and after *s, *w seems to have given intermediate *b—these may not have happened simultaneously for obvious reasons. *y gives /z/ word-initially only.

*w > *b / #_, s_.

Palatalization chain shift.. Dental stops become /s/ or /z/ (this has to have been before the stop shift because *d becomes /z/) before *i, *y, *u or *w; plain velars give dentals before front vowels *i or *e.

*t *d *dʰ > s z z / _i, _y, _u, _w
*k *g *gʰ > t d dʰ / _i, _y, _e

Stop shift.

*T *D *Dʰ > Tʰ T D; this includes *b from older *w (which is reflected as /p/: ⲡⲓⲉⲭⲟⲥ 'wolf'.)

Treatment of syllabic consonants

Syllabic consonants gain epenthetic e. If they're in a word-initial syllable as *CṚ and CRe is a permissible syllable, they give that. Otherwise, they give eR. There seems not to have been any difference between regular syllabic consonants and lengthened syllabic consonants before a laryngeal.

A few vowel changes.

First, post-consonantal *w and *y metathesize with a preceding consonant, unless it's word-initial; in word-initial syllables they just drop. (After consonant clusters, Siever's Law had already applied.)

*Cw *Cy > *w(C)C *y(C)C / V_

Following this, *l becomes *y after a consonant, and *w after a vowel.

*u(:) and *o merge, then split again, based on length.

*o(:) > *u(:)
*ŭ *ū > o u

Short *i merges with *e, à la Cree/Ojibwe, as ĭ. Long then joins to give plain /i/.

*oy *ey merge with to give e. (As you can see, the length distinction is slowly but surely collapsing into oblivion).

*ew *ow *aw give o u u.

Short and long *a merge.

Nasal-stop voicing

A nasal before a stop voices the stop and then disappears.

*NTʰ *NT *ND > D

Remaining *ns gives *z. *s becomes z also before nasals and remaining voiced stops.

Loss of *w

Remaining instances of *w between vowels drop. Since vowel length is no longer phonemic, this can creates hiatuses: ⲟⲩⲓⲥ [] 'sheep' (from *h₂ówis.)

*y generally stays between vowels, but original *-eye- ended up as hiatused -ⲓⲓ-, e.g. ⲟⲩⲓⲓⲥ 'sheep (pl.)' [].

Grassmann's Law

The first of two aspirated stops deaspirates. Since Bosporan aspirates come from plain PIE voiced stops, this applies in entirely separate words than in Greek and Sanskrit. As in Sanskrit, this also occurs in clusters: ⲡⲑⲉⲣ 'father'.

Tʰ...Tʰ... > T...Tʰ...

Some other, minor developments

*sr gives dr; *sn *sm metathesized, merged as *ns, and became /z/. (E.g. ⲓⲍⲟⲥⲁ 'daughter-in-law', from *snusós.)

Word-final *m becomes /n/ as in Greek, Gaulish and Phrygian.

Accent is neutralized, though it's not clear what the details are. Since Greek without accents looks fugly, the standard transcription uses Greek miniscule, written here with a Coptic typeface.
in thread: dhoklang scratchpad...3.0? NP: Bosporan
? Whimemsz posts: 29
, Foreigner message
<@vlad> man
<@vlad> mainstream australian views on aborigines
<Cev> You can probably replace "mainstream australian" with "mainstream Anglosphere"
<@vlad> does the mainstream anglosphere even know what aborigines are
<Cev> Yeah
<Cev> They sit in the desert half-naked blowing in didgeridoos and talking about the dreamtime
<@pharazon> aborigines are born 70 years old
in thread: Quote Thread
? Cev Grammatis Qaghan
posts: 69
, Operon message
<Cevf> I don't understand the 14th amendment
<Cevf> I mean I understand the part that defines citizenship
<Cevf> But the main part of it I don't get
<Cevf> because it basically says, like, "You have to obey the rest of the laws written in the Constitution"
<Cevf> because apparently that wasn't clear before?
<Slereah> Maybe it's a state law thing?
<Cevf> Yes it is but that's my point
<Slereah> Like states can't make laws going against the constitution
<Cevf> Yes it is but that's my point
<Cevf> Why even have a Constitution if that's even an option?
<Slereah> So that you can brag about it
<Slereah> "Our state follows the constitution!"
<Cevf> How about you just have 1 Amendment: "Obey the laws of your respective states"
<Cevf> That seems to be effectively what they DID
<Slereah> Maybe it was the case before too, but it wasn't terribly enforced so they added this for emphasis
<Slereah> Maybe someone pulled an airbud on them
<Guest3907> I think that amendment is because reconstruction states were trying to say that blacks in their state weren't citizens of that state
<Slereah> "It's not written anywhere in the constitution that you have to obey the constitution!"
<Guest3907> it also kept confederate politicians out of the government
<Slereah> The Airbud Amendment
<@vlad> <Cevf> I don't understand the 14th amendment < I agree it is stupid
<Slereah> vlad confirmed for racist

<Cevf> ok
<Cevf> fuck it
<Cevf> I'm adding "nuanced" to my list of forbidden words
<Guest34592> why?? can't handle nuances
<WurdBendur> cev likes to keep things simple
<Cevf> Can't handle the self-satisfaction of people talking about how their view is more nuanced than others'.
<WurdBendur> yes, that's right
<Guest34592> I just say it's better
<WurdBendur> let's speak out against this self-righteousness
<Cevf> Enough with the diatribes, Wurd.
<@pthag> ur all stomping ur feet
<@pthag> banned banned banned
<@pthag> scum and villany
<WurdBendur> you're a nazi

<Guest62009> do you think that if I went to the white house and held a gun to my head someone would get around to porting Civ II to modern PCs

<@tiramisu> mec didn't even say goodbye
<@tiramisu> so rude
<@tiramisu> oh wait he did
<@pharazon> still rude

<tiramisu> Naima Cevf's penis is shaped like
<Naima> Cevf's penis is shaped like a star of david lynch video game review of Pacman and he insinuates that the viewers probably have never played pacman on google maps today at the thrift store i saw a woman on the bridge."
<Slereah> Oy vey
<tiramisu> [[star of [david lynch]] video] or [[star of david][lynch video]]?
<Slereah> that's why we must all switch to lojban

<@Radius> the best place to build an island though, for sheer remoteness from anything else
<twanh> is in space?
<@Radius> is atop koko guyot, which is a seamount in the north pacific about halfway between hawaii and japan
<twanh> ooh

<pthagnar> Also, the original Star Trek mostly shows the Enterprise crew being pretty competent, but now we're only allowed to have science explorer heroes if the focus is on the captain being unqualified for his rank.

<Slereah__> He is called Chuck Norris
<Slereah__> is that short for
<Slereah__> Charles Norris

<@tiramisu> I want to see if "good chapel boy pounding" is a combination of things or if someone (pthagnar) has said that whole phrase before

<Slereah> if Bilbo pees while invisible, at what point does his urine become visible

<@Legion> you know what's worst than "never forget"?
<@Legion> people calling something "The Forgotten X"
<@Legion> when that something is like the second most talked about X ever
<@Legion> (eg: calling the Armenian genocide "The Forgotten Genocide")

<@pharazon> i hired a few movers recently
<@pharazon> when they arrived they were black
<@Cevf> were they no longer black after they'd been there a while?

<Whimemsz> here's some good news to cheer you up then
<Whimemsz>  there's fewer vampires in Malawi now than before!
<Guest24991> the person I feel most bad for is the president of Malawi
<Guest24991> whoever they are, they are probably a very well-educated person who doesn't believe in vampires and just wants the country to succeed
<Guest24991> then this happens
<Guest24991> and he knows the boulder has rolled to the bottom of the hill

<@tiramisu> oh shit this Skyler guy is only 18
<@tiramisu> well, at least he's 18

<Whimemsz>  this is kind of weird
<Whimemsz> a collection of words in double-vowel orthography and ... random English-based spellings
<Cevf> what's the difference between "Greetings" and "Hello"
<Whimemsz> none
<@pharazon> the funny thing is that there's not even an english word for "Greetings"
<@pharazon> like you have a character in a movie say "Greetings!" to indicate that they're an alien

<Cevf> woot
<Cevf> Handbook of Texas Supplement Volume III arrived in the mail
<Slereah> Does it have more injun tales
<Cevf> It has articles about approximately eighty-nine thousand obscure little Indian tribes
<Cevf> all written by T.N. Campbell
<Slereah> do you think he made some of them up
<Slereah> The bloopablorp tribe
<Slereah> Very friendly
<Slereah> They have 3 heads and worship a goose
<Whimemsz> Slereah, alias Herodotus

<Whimemsz>  this one is fun too
<Whimemsz> "Dinosaurs such as Tyrannosaurus Rex with their absurdly small fore-limbs would have hopped like kangaroos which also have small arms. "
<twabs> haha
<@Legion> well, there are serious studies on Tyrannosaurus that propose that they couldn't run but would indeed hop around more like certain birds, iirc
<Cevf> counterpoint, only small birds hop around
<Cevf> large birds don't
<Cevf> t-rex was a very large bird
<Slereah> Science has been trying to emasculate the T-Rex so much these past 20 years I wouldn't be surprised that they were announced to be small birds soon
<CUM_SIURAN> are small birds unmasculine?
<Slereah> yes
<Slereah> Hence why they have names like tits
<Slereah> Or boobies
<Whimemsz> you know what's a masculine bird though
<Whimemsz> cocks
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<Seraphinus> at the Spanish conversation group that I go to, a met a Russian guy in his early 20s (who speaks really good Spanish, entirely self-taught)
<Seraphinus> he was telling that at the public school he went to he was taught almost nothing of Soviet history
<Seraphinus> telling me that*
<kaakitwitaasota> unsurprising, really
<kaakitwitaasota> i keep trying to find Robert Conquest in bookstores here and I don't think there's a single copy of the man's work anywhere in the country
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<pharazon> we don't fight here, friend
<pharazon> we resolve our differences by filk
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<twabs> is animal husbandry outlawed in islam
<YaaliAnnar> I'm pretty sure having an animal husband is a ground for capital punishment.
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<twabs_> less grandiose but more interesting forename which a peer of mine has: Loyal
<twabs_> this is odd because it seems to be a virtue name but it's an adjective
<kaakitwitaasota> ah yeah virtue names
<kaakitwitaasota> i'm naming my daughter Noblesse Oblige Nilsen
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, Foreigner message

<@Legion> I remember this tagline from the "Hard-sci movie plots" twitter
<@Legion> "An alien spacecraft collides with Earth at relativistic speed; Earth is instantly destroyed."
<Cevf> I get a feeling lots of these end with "Earth is instantly destroyed"
<Cevf> "Earth is hit with a direct beam from a gamma ray burst; Earth is instantly destroyed"
<Cevf> "The frontier of quantum vacuum collapse approaches at the speed of light; Earth is instantly destroyed"
<@Legion> :)
<@Legion> well the gist of the twitter account was like
<@Legion> taking premises from various sci-fi films
<@Legion> and explain the realistic consequences
<@Legion> in 140 chars
<Cevf> "An ancient kaiju awakens from millennia-long slumber beneath the Pacific ocean. Marine biologists earn their tenure observing it as it transits the seas, eating krill and plankton."
<@Legion> :)
<Cevf> Or, better, "An ancient kaiju awakens from millennia-long slumber and collapses due to allometric scaling laws."
<Cevf> "Nazi archaeologists unearth an ancient Babylonian magical tablet. It describes a haruspical remedy for tooth-ache. The Nazis test the remedy and find it ineffective."
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