<!>Your Worst Nooblang (2014-11-16 00:41:20)
Your Worst Nooblang
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? Uzhdarchios posts: 19
, Foreigner in Unknown Kadath
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Qoqqkyuk seems downright usable for a first conlang, all things considered. Where’d that single geminate /k/ come from, though?

Most of my nooblang papers are back at home while I’m off at college, but (un)fortunately I have enough of one of them to produce something. So: my third conlang, Sazhere! — made at c. 12 years old with zero knowledge of linguistics, and used for a horrid fantasy novel that reads like a parody of the Silmarillion.

For the phonology, my goal was to put in every sound that was possible for humans to produce. Needless to say, I failed (thankfully), but here’s what I had:

/m n ɲ ŋ/
/p b t d ⁿd k g ᵑg/
/t͡ʃ d͡ʒ ps ts ks/
/f v θ ð s z ɕ ʃ ʒ x ʁ ʕ h/
/r l ɻ ʎ j ʀ̥ ʀ w/
/! ǃ͡qʼ/
/a æ ɛ~e ɪ i ǝ ɝ ɔ o ʌ ʊ u/
/aj ej ju ow/

The orthography was an excessively complicated runelike alphabet. There was no consistent romanization.

The grammar was mostly isolating, with the exception of genitive and plural suffixes and some tense affixes on the verb. Mostly it was just English with some arbitrary changes (adjectives follow nouns! articles don’t exist! no subject-verb agreement! etc.). Second- and third-person pronouns had three genders; otherwise there were none. The number system was standard old base 10 (my previous lang had been base 20, which had gotten tiresome).

Fragmentary sample:
/saʒiɻ rom aθow oɻmaǝɻ nɔsǝðɔl 5105 θinɔn aʀ̥ aglarkǝɻan ɪkɛθ ʒowðǝɻ/...
»Sazhere is a tongue invented in 5105 HE by aglarkǝɻan and modified...«

More complete sample, but with unknown pronunciation:

Nothon ak ondontor alth rama gur
Alth rama augir iketh ot-tho onosi kaiur
Kath goror arelur ot-rom rama bril onto arelur
Augiril zhar rom arelur anatosur

Nothon ak athosir ‘Alth rom don!’
Alth rama gur iketh arelu ot-tho aki azhon
Ayanir tethnir, nerth rom nothon don
Alth rama gur rom nosomur kul ener tson

Nothon ak athosir ‘Alth rom dham!’
Arelu rom nerthamur, arelu rom nertham
Now I bring here the tide made of dark,
The tide made of corruption and that which they hide.
It purges everything of everything that is made of light;
The power of corruption is eating everything.

Now I call, ‘The Tide is near!’ —
The tide made of dark and all that which we fear.
The storm gathers; the end is now near.
The tide made of dark is waiting for the last command.

Now I call, ‘The Tide is here!’
All is ending, all is undone.