Quote Thread
Anthologica Universe Atlas / Academia / Miscellaneria / Quote Thread

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? Yaali Annar The Gote
posts: 94
, Initiate Speaker message
In this thread, we share clever, silly, smartass remarks both from foreroom or from the chatroom.

Legion: You know that feeling about languages where you wish you could learn ALL OF THEM? I get that, but with musical instruments.
Slereah_: I get that with dildos.


YaaliAnnar: Zayk, you see, you're gay because you lack non-sexual intimacy in your childhood.
Zayk: What is the logic behind  that?
YaaliAnnar: This causes you to crave for intimacy. This is why most children raised without father become gay.
Kereb: ... or rappers


Cev: Make a lake, put an island on it
Cev: wait 2 nights
Cev: and there will be Polynesians there


Serafin: Yaali also truly believes smoking cures lung cancer.
CUM_quesa: See, this is why indonesia is not a first world country.
? Rhetorica Sleepless Scribe
posts: 1204
, Kelatetía, Terminus
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(The "..." at the start of the topic is just a placeholder for the rest of the topic.)

<Cev> So anyway, yeah I think that pretty much seals the issue for me of whether Robert Price is a crackpot.
<Cev> Endorsing the Sarah Palin of religious studies is pretty much an unforgivable sin.
<Cev> It's like quoting Adolf Hitler in a presidential inauguration speech.
* Nessari has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev advocates quoting Hitler in inauguration speeches"
* Cev has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev advocates quoting Hitler"
<Nessari> so
<Cev> Come on, that was an obvious lead-in for you guys to further change it to "Cev advocates ... Hitler"
* YaaliAnnar has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev advocates quoting."
<Nessari> I'm applying to a pizza call center tomorrow.
* Rhetorica has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev advocates."
* Nessari has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev hitlers."
* Rhetorica has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev advocates Hitlers."
<-> Cev is now known as Cev_Hitler
<Cev_Hitler> Hallo.
<Cev_Hitler> Mein Nahme ist Cev Hitler.
* Nessari has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev advocates being Hitlers."
* Rhetorica has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev is being Hitlers."
* Nessari has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev is of being Hitlers."
<-> Cev_Hitler is now known as Cev
* Nessari has changed topic for #isharia to: "... | Cev is of being incognito Hitlers."
? Cev Grammatis Qaghan
posts: 68
, Operon message
<pthagnar> if you supported a plot to kill stalin with apple juice
<pthagnar> i would say you are a fool and a lunatic

<travisb> think like Indiana
<pthagnar> durr im a worse version of illinois

<Cev> well you know what Jesus said, pthag
<Cev> "Who do they say I am?"
<pthagnar> a wizard
<pthagnar> specialising in nature and healing magic
<slereah_> Dude
<slereah_> That's stupid
<slereah_> Jesus was a cleric
<slereah_> Channeling the power of YHWH
<slereah_> Obviously
<Nessari> *super saiyan
<slereah_> According to a D&D review I read, they estimated that Jesus was about level 20
<CUM_quesa> what was his power level though?
<Nessari> pre-crucifixion, I assume
<Cev> Sler: no he does everything from his own power
<Cev> He's quite explicit about this
<Cev> "the Son of Man has the authority to forgive sins" or something
<Cev> So he's more a mage than a cleric
<CUM_quesa> what level do you need to be at to forgive sins?
<CUM_quesa> does D&D cover this?

<slereah_> "The caliph al-Ḥakim (996-1020) vigorously applied the Pact of Umar, and compelled the Jews to wear bells and to carry in public the wooden image of a calf."
<slereah_> wat
<Legion> jews were compelled to all kinds of silly things in the middle age
<Legion> I tell you, the yellow star was p mild, in comparison
<slereah_> It's no cowbell, that's for sure
<slereah_> Holocaust movies would be hilarious
<Legion> man, thank god the nazi didn't think of that; cows breeders would have to pay huge compensations to the ADL to keep the right to use bells
<slereah_> Much like bakers now pay for the right to use ovens



? Izambri Left of the middle
posts: 729
, Duke, Catatonia
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<TheFizzMeister> One good thing that would've come from Romney winning would be that those wacky Mormons would be under more scrutiny.
[...]
<Radius> why do the Morons need to be under more scrutiny?
[...]
<Radius> ...oh jesus christ
<Radius> that was an actual typo, I can't fucking believe that
? Yaali Annar The Gote
posts: 94
, Initiate Speaker message
pharazon: What is even the point of wingdings.
pharazon: Like ok maybe you want to type a star of david or a little airplane.
YaaliAnnar: Wingdings is from the day before unicode isn't it?
CUM_quesa: Maybe. It's p. old.
pharazon: Yes, have you ever seen those old sumerian tablets?
pharazon: It's all wingdings.


H13: "citizens of Malaysia are allowed to enter North Korea without a visa" what?
Legion: (fine print: they're not allowed to leave without a visa though).


Errant_ibises: /e/ was cut from greek a  few moths ago, though. The crisis.


CUM_quesa: I have been watching that My Słowanie video over and over again
CUM_quesa: I am now a slavic nationalist
? Izambri Left of the middle
posts: 729
, Duke, Catatonia
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I don't remember saying that about Greek... *has fish-memory*

Edit: the smiley is sticking out its tongue.
? Yaali Annar The Gote
posts: 94
, Initiate Speaker message
Cev: "The phonology and morphology of Halfway River Beaver"
Cev: there's a language called Halfway River Beaver
Cev: what are these named by a random word generator?


Cev: "An Oregon mom charged with one count of murder, five counts of murder by abuse and one count of second-degree assault in the death of her 4-year-old son."
Cev: Wait, how can you be charged with 6 separate counts of murder of one person?
Zayk: Gays are worth more to liberals than the average human being.


slereah: I wonder why the samoyeds are such happy dogs.
slereah: Was there a special happy breeding?
slereah: Maybe they shot all the sad dogs.


Nesescosac: I woke up from sleep because I was dreaming about avocados, and now I can't stop thinking about them.
Rhetorica: That sounds disturbing.
Nesescosac: Doesn't help neither that I'm doing Yucatec homework so avocados feature in the example sentences.
Nessari: I'm sorry to have to break this to you like this Nes, but you're pregnant.
Nesescosac: Am I going to have an avocado baby?
Nessari: I don't know, have you been sleeping with avacados lately?
? Yaali Annar The Gote
posts: 94
, Initiate Speaker message
Cev: These two pro-wrestlers. They walk out to "La Marseilles", one is waving a French flag and the other has "FRANCE" written on their speedos.
Cev: I can't figure out where they're from.
Guitarplayer: Probably Australia.

Zayk: Guys, it's snowing in parts of Chicago right now.n
Slereah: You could do catheter + enema plug.
Zayk: Oh God.
Zayk: I came in at the wrong time.
Zayk: Goodbye.

CUM_quesa: What is the name of the thing you say three times to become a muslim? (but only if you REALLY MEAN IT)
YaaliAnnar: CUM_quesa, there’s no such thing.
CUM_quesa: Wait what?
YaaliAnnar: You just only have to say Shahada once.
CUM_quesa: Oh...
CUM_quesa: Fuck I think I confused islam and beetlejuice.

Slereah: Homosexuals are unable to breed on their own. The only way to increase their numbers is by stealing other peoples children.
YaaliAnnar: Ooooh so that’s why homosexuals are called fairies!
YaaliAnnar: Fairies kidnap children to raise as their own.
Slereah: That's why you must leave a saucer of milk for the gays at night.
? Hallow XIII Primordial Crab
posts: 479
, 子, Dalian, China
message
* Nessari changes topic to 'http://anthologi.ca | confabulation is the last polka-dotted sock of 15 x 10^6 unsavoury new york jewish SA hitlers in terms of population size'
<@Rhetorica> and you can stick that into your colourless green idea pipe
<@Rhetorica> and smoke it
<@Rhetorica> furiously
? Nortaneous ? ?????
posts: 458
, Marquis, Maryland
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23:31 < TheFizzMeister> My dog gets so adorably excited when I get rawhide out for him to chew on.
23:31 < Cev> d'asss ^_^
23:32 < Cev> *d'awww
? Rhetorica Sleepless Scribe
posts: 1204
, Kelatetía, Dis
message
<YaaliAnnar> The most I have ever bleed was when I was playing with a PVC pipe.
<YaaliAnnar> I learned that PVC pipe should always be outside a human body.
? Izambri Left of the middle
posts: 729
, Duke, Catatonia
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Online sex shops exist to avoid such domestic accidents!
? Nessari ?????? ?????? ????????
posts: 932
, Illúbequía, Seattle, Cascadia
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3sdMFNS.png
? Rhetorica Sleepless Scribe
posts: 1204
, Kelatetía, Dis
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I fixed that! (grumble, grumble)
? Nessari ?????? ?????? ????????
posts: 932
, Illúbequía, Seattle, Cascadia
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*giggles and runs off*
? Hallow XIII Primordial Crab
posts: 479
, 子, Dalian, China
message
Some more out-of-context gems from the chat
All those IRC quotes. Has nobody posted anything funny on the forums yet?

<@Rhetorica> there's no dramatic word for hacking and slashing a bunch of people
<H13> mongol, v. to hack and slash a bunch of people, preferably on horseback
<Nessari> <A Florida Man mongoled 159 people yesterday in what law enforcement officials are calling an "unpremeditated attack.">

<Nae> should I give Stalin super powers?
<rhetorica|work> is being stalin not a superpower

<Nortaneous> what is so hard about ts
<H13> nort: korean doesn't have it
<Nortaneous> what, don't they all play tsarcraft

<H13> okay actually i am probably going to sanify this thing a bit
<H13> clicks AND consonant clusters is insane enough already
<H13> so let's make that [ᶢǁ͡ɢjẽ̤ː ɕᵑǀ͡qʼwŋːʔ xwjyt̚ mtsʼauʔ dɤ̤]
<H13> I LIED
<Nessari> you did say 'a bit'

<Nortaneous> /tɬʰcʰpʰtsʷʰtʷʰkʷʰtsʷʰrʷatʷʰkʷʰtsʷʰkʷʰtʷʰtʷʰtsʷʰ pʰcʰtʰərʷ/
<H13> are you trying to out-salish salish
<Nortaneous> yes
? Pthagnar Benedictine Ovulation
posts: 205
, Quaestor, Hole of Aspiration
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quoting urself is p crass
? Jipí der saz ûf eime steine
posts: 284
, Transition Metal, Germany
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In an academic context, it's kinda OK if you refer back to something you had written earlier, but posting your own jokes? I agree with Pthag there.
? Nessari ?????? ?????? ????????
posts: 932
, Illúbequía, Seattle, Cascadia
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Meh there's worse sins. So long as they're not dumb, GO FORTH, SELF-QUOTERS, AND SEIZE YOUR LATIN AMERICAN JURY-RIGGED LOLLYPOPS AND CHAGRINED MATTRESSES
? Hallow XIII Primordial Crab
posts: 479
, 子, Basel, Switzerland
message
I have removed this egregious outburst of narcissism and apologize for offending your sensibilities
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